I did not think to think,
And neither was I told,
Yet it came as natural
As a goosebump in the cold.
I did not think to think,
But when not blinded by a blink,
I held my car keys,
And many other morning things.
Yes it was Tuesday—
I did not think to think,
In hopes to keep mindless
Til the end of the week,
But though I didn’t think to think,
I thought a thought I knew was true—-
“You know who you are,
Never stop being you.”
Somethings very hopeful about the sun
It makes me hum without my throat
I’ll take a stroll down Sesame Street
And sit on the couch we gave away
My destination is the bosom of God,
Stretching his wings in thin long clouds
I stepped on the brake,
Regaining focus from hope,
Yet My wool sweater,
My work day,
My wishes for one day,
Can’t leave me hot and bothered.
In fact the heat goes to my hands,
To capture it as best I can.
Clueless I threw myself blindly into hope
By reel of untrustworthy strangers
And in my quest to not be ice on life’s stove
I ended up silent as someone unlike me…
But as I reach into thought,
I burn the clouds of opinion,
And kick the winter of low self-esteem,
To humbly welcome my summer.
It’s easy to reminisce and say
Life was me,
But that would ignore that I
Wanted,
And all of it was like breathing during sleep,
Just I was too awake to realize it.
I guess I packed bags,
Though I never had luggage.
What I took,
I’ll never have again.
It was my youthful days,
Full of fun and worry,
But it’s troubling to see
I’ll never again be free.
Because life isn’t me,
That was an impostor!
Real life waits
In a dead end job,
In no friends,
In a crib,
In bengay,
In failure,
In pain,
In gray,
To end in bingo!
Anyone can sully my name:
The thing about it is
of all ppl I’ve seen,
Whether we washed hands in adjacent bathroom sinks,
Or we sharpened each other in study groups,
Disappear.
But until I die,
I can’t avoid the mirror,
And you know what?
No one more than me deserves
To be seen as worthy;
Not everyone could defeat my victories.
Excellence is to stop expecting
World War III.
I don’t want to die, but
Maybe crawl out,
Or fly out like a
Butterfly from a cocoon.
At the very least because
I will overheat.
I’ll try to clench my jaw,
As if the energy from the clench
Will close my eyes.
I bite my lip to keep from
Profaning.
I want to leave,
But I don’t.
I fight myself,
But look the other way
The rest of the day.
I’m not heavy with hate,
But filled with Saturday.
But I hear the garage rumble
As I wake from the sofa.
Mom walks through the door
In her yellow scrub,
With groceries.
Footsteps from upstairs
Creak;
Welcome, calls from upstairs.
Dad walks downstairs,
Without his walker.
I won’t be making any coffee.
I won’t be making breakfast before 7.
I’ll make it at 8.
It will taste much better today.
I no longer have needles in my pinkie toes.
In I walked, not in polyester slacks,
But cotton sweats.
I nodded as if to pick my head up,
But it was to acknowledge an old buddy.
Buzz buzz buzz
As dead hair flies from 6ft high coffins
And as every word is stretched for coolness…
What’s uuuuuup, big maaaaan, as they grin.
There’s sex on the Tv. A kid getting cut says leave it on. We laugh.
I saw the tall stalks of grass
Lathering my face,
And my heart and feet
Were both in a race,
And I couldn’t look back,
Because she was fast,
So I squeezed her hand in the
Palm of mine,
As sweat fell from my head
Though rain plummeted hard,
And as if due to a food I ate,
Laughs; laughs uncontrollable,
Laughing from my nose,
Laughing from my armpits ,
From my mouth,
With her.
If rashes here would be so painful,
How’d I survive the roads?
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